20090516

2 cups iced tea from soda dispenser
1 cup blueberry herb iced tea

I saw my friend get slapped in the face a minimum of five times.

I think I'm going to take out the flow limiter of my Nerf Maverick. It should shoot farther, faster, and more accurately.

I discovered that Puffin cereal no longer chews up my palate. They must have changed their recipe.

I wonder if there's any way to get farts to smell pleasant.

I am the greatest hairdresser ever to walk the earth. I have mastered the mullet, bested the bic head, and perfected the pony-tail. My scissors and razors are not only forged with a platinum and meteoric steel alloy, but are also studded with precious gems donated from the Crown Jewels of the British Royal Family. Don't expect me to talk to you about your life while I cut and craft your hair, however. Save your drama for your mama.