20090514

1 cup black tea + splenda + hazelnut creamer
2 cups blueberry herb iced tea

I saw a couple episodes of Californication. I don't know what I love more, the endless tits or watching David Duchovny have at all those endless tits.

I think that if a large animal is trying to eat you, the best thing to do it shove something sharp into its mouth. Countless sandwiches have delayed the inevitable in this fashion using toothpicks.

I discovered that a 3.0-5.0 volt running through your tongue tastes disgusting.

I wonder how long it will be until my multigrain bread goes moldy.

I am the greatest plumber in the world. I've battled the largest logs and snaked the most plugged of pipes. I love humanity, but look upon all those with long hair with distrust... for they are the unwitting pawns of my most hated enemy: Haggatha of the Hair Clog.